Why the greatest triumphs come out of the greatest failures
For too many years, I sat idle with dreams and goals.
Too scared to start over from scratch and too scared to take the plunge, so instead I sat comfortable on the stump of regret.
I’d put all my blood, sweat, and effort into constructing freeways and roads ninety percent of the time and the rest was for family.
Unfortunately, life was also consumed with keeping up with the Jones’ and trying to keep everyone happy, except for the person that needed a pep talk to get his priorities straight now and again — which was me.
Consumption became the instant gratification of choice, unfortunately, that unquenchable thirst left me unfulfilled and empty for so many years.
I’d spend time and money on the newest stuff for my family, unfortunately that unquenchable thirst left me unfulfilled and empty for so many years.
Unfortunately, that unquenchable thirst left me unfulfilled and empty for so many years and with thoughts of — one day things will be different.
In retrospect, yes, my blue-collar career brought a comfortable lifestyle for my family but at the wrong cost.
The money sucked me in and made it difficult to walk away from for years, but I had a plan.
Unfortunately, even the best thought out plans will have holes as misfortune shows up — and boy did they ever show up.
The new plan began to take shape, as momentum was building it would soon come to a screeching halt.
Because the person I had built my life with was ready for a new start too, but unfortunately without me.
I was blindsided and shocked.
I spiraled down a dark hole as more would be revealed.
What I found, was life would break me at my core. I would lose everything I thought was precious in my world.
It took months to re-aim my sights and keep going with a full head of steam at my dreams.
Fortunately, the worst stuff would open up a whole new perspective, and a whole new world of experiencing everything at its fullest and being fulfilled by life wasn’t a pipe dream anymore.
The greatest triumphs come out of the greatest failures.
When going through hard times there is a powerful force that is at our disposal and ready to be activated if we choose to unleash it.
It is the power of Contrast.
What is the power of contrast?
It can be summed up as follows:
The power of contrast
Experiencing horrific events and experiencing euphoric events within a short period of each other, juxtaposition or comparing opposite events in our lives which shift us to a new perspective and life epiphany.
Example: Our best friend who is our pet passes away, then the following weeks after; we land an amazing opportunity at a new job that we never saw coming.
We’ve experienced complete opposite emotions and experiences on the spectrum of life within a close period.
Fortunately, vulnerability opens to experiencing new life-altering opportunity, that would have been harder to let in.
Like the joy of a new job after feeling the pain of losing a beloved pet.
Like the joy of a new job after feeling the pain of losing a beloved pet. These new life-changing experiences become threshold periods for new things to appear.
Jumping from one side of the emotional spectrum to the other, we gladly welcome in joy over angst.
So we contrast the two events, viewing the possible connection.
As one painful event perhaps brought a joyful event to us, but in reality we were completely open to accepting joy rather than pain.
So the euphoric joy of the contrasting event is savored over our recent painful memory that much more.
Hence, the power of contrast.
In my life, when everything was crumbling something weird happened. (I never would’ve guessed it).
Funny but I wasn’t afraid to fail and look foolish after I understood the power of contrast. I was delighted by the fulfillment of the reward versus the pain of the risk.
Having learned the hard way that all pain is temporary, and that temporary failure is just that —temporary, I felt greater pain in not taking risks and living for my dreams.
After the worst storm had hit my personal life, all I wanted was to be free of the trauma.
Finding happiness became everything and living a life on my terms was all I strived for, day-in- and day-out.
Going against my previous traditional beliefs was easy, when everything I believed in was vanishing before my eyes.
Starting over with a clean slate wasn’t fun, but with an improved vision for my life, I began to see more opportunity than ever before.
When this new perspective kicked in, I would tell myself — if the worst stuff possible could happen, then why not best stuff possible?
Why the heck not?
So I focused on limitless possibilities that led to the best outcomes, which resulted in the best turning points in my life.
Then guess what happened?
Some crazy stuff happened during this process, being uncomfortable became my new home as I first found failures and then multiple successes.
Fortunately, they both served me well.
To name a few failures I went through; betrayal, foreclosure, bankruptcy, divorce, job loss, situational alcoholism, incarceration, ridiculed by local media as a suspect in a high-speed chase. (Yeah, crazy story.)
Some triumphs:
Found a significant other who lights me up, befriended and mentored by numerous ultra-successful entrepreneurs, left a dead-end career of ten years, worked for two large Fortune 500 companies, took epic trip to Disney World with daughters and girlfriend, performed live on stage in front of a large crowd, walked on fire ( yes, I’m a fire walker), traveled to Florida, Las Vegas, Houston, Dallas, Phoenix, started an online business, currently self-authoring a book and created countless memorable moments that inspire me to this day.
why the greatest triumphs come from the greatest failures?
Because I’ve lived them.
Vidal Cisneros Jr. also featured in:
Huffington Post Divorce 10 Things No One Tells You About Divorce
The Goodmen Project The Day I Knew My Marriage Was Over